This blog is in honor of my dear friend A. and a crisis which seems to occur in some men called the Stage Fright Penis. Most commonly occurs in those young men who we woman can't get enough of, that one guy that you don't know why but you just want to pounce him every chance you get. Then when you finally get him in bed with his cloths of, all your dreams are shattered because he can't get it up. Or in my girls case he starts to get it up but than gets a stomach cramp and has to stop. A stomach cramp?! Seriously? You know what I would say if my man was like I have a stomach cramp, I'd say man the fuck up, or atleast lie down and let me get on top of you so we can both still get something out of this.
Turns out this guy couldnt get it up on several other occasions, yet everynight she went over to hang out with him he would ask her to stay. But why would she stay if there isnt going to be a happy ending?
My theory abouth this stage fright stems from a simple thing we all like to call the school boy crush. I dont mean that fabulous myth we all heard growing up about boys being mean to you if they like you, because honestly theres a 50/50 chance that that is actually true. I mean the nervous, mumbling of words, following you like a puppy dog, eyes smile everytime youre around thing that happens most commonly when a younger guy likes and older woman. Once they reach college though, they add this thing in with the penis, he wants the penis to work, but for some strange reason (even with a super hot girl in front of them), the penis falls as flat as the muffled words falling out of his mouth. I.e. may I present to you the not so amazing Stage Fright Penis! A Performance that will never be sold out and despite acting classes may always have a seat in the back of our minds.
The circumstance becomes one that is more fraustrating then anything, and these questions then start to pop into any girls mind: What if this is only a one time occurance? If it's a one time occurance, does that mean this is just some random fluke? OMG This is so lame, maybe I should just go home. But what if he wants to see me again? Maybe I could train him, I'm so sick of training guys....And here enlies the bigger issue and the ultimate disappointment of the Stage Fright Penis, the fear of having to train them into performing on their own. Sometimes training can be fun, but not if we want pleasure now! We don't want a drooling puppy dog we want a strong stiff beast!
Turns out this guy couldnt get it up on several other occasions, yet everynight she went over to hang out with him he would ask her to stay. But why would she stay if there isnt going to be a happy ending?
My theory abouth this stage fright stems from a simple thing we all like to call the school boy crush. I dont mean that fabulous myth we all heard growing up about boys being mean to you if they like you, because honestly theres a 50/50 chance that that is actually true. I mean the nervous, mumbling of words, following you like a puppy dog, eyes smile everytime youre around thing that happens most commonly when a younger guy likes and older woman. Once they reach college though, they add this thing in with the penis, he wants the penis to work, but for some strange reason (even with a super hot girl in front of them), the penis falls as flat as the muffled words falling out of his mouth. I.e. may I present to you the not so amazing Stage Fright Penis! A Performance that will never be sold out and despite acting classes may always have a seat in the back of our minds.
The circumstance becomes one that is more fraustrating then anything, and these questions then start to pop into any girls mind: What if this is only a one time occurance? If it's a one time occurance, does that mean this is just some random fluke? OMG This is so lame, maybe I should just go home. But what if he wants to see me again? Maybe I could train him, I'm so sick of training guys....And here enlies the bigger issue and the ultimate disappointment of the Stage Fright Penis, the fear of having to train them into performing on their own. Sometimes training can be fun, but not if we want pleasure now! We don't want a drooling puppy dog we want a strong stiff beast!
No comments:
Post a Comment